From the time I was shot and lost my right eye, self hatred towards myself started and I truly believed I was ugly always looking for flaws about myself. This self hatred unfortunately consumed me. I was a very broken young lady who felt perfection and beauty was the only way to find happiness and acceptance in this world.
I was listening to the enemy’s whispers and believed everyone…until Jesus came and showed me the truth of how He saw me. This is what I discovered:
Physical beauty does not bring happiness; it does not satisfy. What is the point of being physically beautiful on the outside when inside one can feel ugly, unhappy and totally miserable?
I caked on the makeup, dressed in fancy clothes, smiled as I pretended everything is okay, portraying I have it all together. But when I got home and washed off that made-up face in the bathroom sink, the reality of the lies I choose to believe about myself still stared at me in the mirror.
That’s why it is so important to love ourselves the way
Jesus loves and sees us.
This can only happen when our eyes are finally opened to believe the truth about our great value. Yes, I talk a lot about our value in my autobiography, because that’s what changed my life. It’s knowing the Father in heaven sees how beautiful I am in His eyes, and knowing that what He created can never be ugly.
No one could imagine David in the Bible being the next king and used mightily for God’s kingdom, since he was of small size and overlooked. He was considered just a shepherd boy, playing a harp and looking after sheep. Jesse assumed that one of his other massive, strapping strong sons would be the chosen one, even Samuel thought the same, and was shocked when it turned out to be little David.
The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart’.
1 Samuel 16:7
Our outward appearance has absolutely nothing to do with our
potential, destiny and happiness in this life. Every one of us, no
matter what we struggle with or look like, has a great purpose on this earth to fulfill. We are all called to make a difference in God’s kingdom. Our Father in heaven has amazing plans for our lives, if we choose to accept.
How do we accept? By saying yes to the Father and coming into
agreement in faith with what He showed us or told us to do. No matter where we grew up, how we did in school, what our past looked like, what we failed in—all of that has no effect on our future and calling, when we realise who we are in Christ Jesus.
Why do we keep looking to the world for our value instead of looking to our heavenly Father? I find the world focusses so much on what people look like on the outside.
God focusses on what people look like on the inside, our hearts. I used to put more time and effort into feeling pretty on the outside than my inside. The truth that God says about myself when digested brings happiness.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look nice when we step out our front door, but we need to make sure it’s balanced and not allow our looks to become an idol, leading into vanity, by making it our main goal.
God would rather see us work on becoming beautifully happy
and content on the inside through Jesus. With that said, I also know it is important to God for us to look after our physical bodies and make healthy choices, as I believe everything in our lives has to be balanced on the inside and out.
But know this: true happiness is being satisfied and feeling fulfilled as we become one with our best friend Jesus, and looking at our life with an eternal perspective.
As we know, beauty fades as we get older, so if we are more concerned with our outer appearance, and our happiness and confidence depend on how we look, how are we going to feel about ourselves when the wrinkles come? Ageing is inevitable.
Knowing Him intimately changes everything.
How do we get to know Jesus so intimately and personally? Well, how do two people become closer every day? For example, a wife and a husband? Or two close friends? By deliberately making frequent time for each other, and being in constant communication.
Spend time with Jesus, praising Him and talking to Him, and
that’s how your soul starts to leap with joy that words can’t explain.
It’s a joy that makes your cup overflow. It’s where true beauty starts to radiate from within and then shines on the outside.
I have proved this through my own experiences. Identity isn’t found in how pretty your face is, or your body shape, or how much luscious hair you have, or what clothes you wear.
It comes from knowing your Creator loves you unconditionally and wants an everlasting relationship with you forever. We are so privileged to have this supernatural everlasting life and relationship with our heavenly Father. Its comforting when I leave this earth I will live forever with the King of the universe who I call papa God.
I will choose that any day over being the most beautiful woman in the world—beauty that will fade over time. But the love and joy Jesus brings never fades; it is eternal! We are all beautiful in God’s eyes.
Let’s not allow magazines, posters, people’s approval, or society
as a whole, to dictate how we feel about ourselves. We are all originals, and there is no one out there like you or me. Only one you, only one me!
Let’s love ourselves wholesomely, being grateful we have breath in our lungs and the privilege of a forever relationship with the One who made the sun, stars and universe—our heavenly Father, the One I love to call Papa God!
1 Peter 3:3–4 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,
which is of great worth in God’s sight.
“Rescued and Redeemed by Grace”